It was a lovely day, just as I would have wanted, they said. Not a cloud in sight and the blue sky was illuminating a twinkle in the tears that were being shared around the court yard of the crematorium. I looked around the room filled with familiar faces, ‘Not a bad turn out’ I thought to myself.

Mum’s there doing the usual, making sure people have enough drinks and a copy of the service. She must have asked the same people three times if they want anything else to drink, even though their glasses are still full. To be honest I think she keeps herself busy to hold back the emotional bomb she’s been avoiding. 

I wish my sister would pick her head up. She’s so pretty when she smiles. I giggle to myself as I notice she’s nearly the same height as grandad now. Most of our childhood, she was the she short dumpy one, and now there she stands as beautiful swan. I will really miss her.

But it’s my best friend who’s coping with this the worst. We have been friends for over twenty years, and she was the one who stood by me whether I was sad or happy. We’d been through a lot together and helped each other through break-ups, house moves and we had the best times when we were together. As the intro to Michael Jacksons song Bad starts to play I see the corner of her mouth smile, and then I feel better.

I am pleased Mum remembered my requests. As the music plays signalling them all to go in, people huddle together consoling each other as they walk and find their seats. I know this isn’t going to be a happy day for people, but I don’t want them to feel guilty about cracking a smile or bursting into laughter. My life was full of good times and I want people to celebrate my life and remember me with a smile.

I look around the room and there are more people here than I thought there would be. People I had met through business, networking events and dinner parties. Some of these people I haven’t seen for a while. It’s good to see them here.

My grandad is the first to speak. He’s always been a strong man and the head of the family. But today he looks weak. He’s a great speaker and I’m excited about what he has to say. He takes a big gulp of water, clears his throat and composes himself.

“Georgina was always full of life. When she walked into a room you knew about it. Her smile could light up with darkest of rooms. Over the past couple of years since she went travelling, things haven’t been the same. I remember when she told us she had decided to go travelling. I’ll be honest and tell you all I never thought she would be away for more than a couple of weeks. She loved her hometown, and there was doubt in my mind that she would stay away from here for long. But she took us all by surprised and really embraced seeing new places. I was so proud when she told us she was settling down in Sydney. Only because it proved she had more balls than I had given her due for. Now she is gone my only regret is not telling her this. Shine on in heaven George, this world will miss you more than my words can tell you.”

The speech was short, but straight to be point. Grandad has never been one for saying more than he needed to.  Tracy Chapman’s song The Promise played out whilst people dried their eyes. I took a deep breath as a noticed Mum was getting up to do her talk. Mum has always been an inspirational speaker and really knows how the work the crowd. But today she seemed different, she wasn’t her usual confident self. As Mum took the stand I noticed she was shaking and tears were beginning to roll down her cheek. But she’s a strong woman, she can do this.

“Okay, firstly I want to thank everyone who has come here today to celebrate Georgina’s life.”  Her lip began to quiver and I could see more tears building in her eyes. ‘Come on Mum, you can do this’ I thought. She took a deep breath and asked for my sister to join her. With my sisters’ hand in hers, she continued.

“My apologies, this has to be the hardest thing I’ve had to do, so please bare with me.

From a child Georgina has always been full of life, never one to miss out on anything and always the centre of attention. She never changed much as she grew into the vivacious women you all knew her as today. She was always talkative, too talkative sometimes, and there were many occasions I would have to tell her to be quiet. She talked so fast, and often I would remind her mid-conversation to take a breath. She’d giggle, breath and then carry on. Georgina and I shared so many special moments together, and I find it hard to believe she isn’t coming home. She was a great person, always looked at things in a positive light. She always had a smile on her face. I never thought I would be standing here today to bury my daughter. It’s such a loss, and we will miss her all tremendously.”


My mum could say no more words. The emotions had taken over. My sister held her tight as she cried. It was usually me who was there for her when times were hard. But today my sister had to step up to the role.


 I hadn’t felt much since the accident, but now a bolt of guilt was running excruciatingly through my veins. This was an emotion stronger than anything I had felt when I was alive. My head fills with the ‘what if’ questions. But this is no time to think ‘What if...’ I shouldn’t have been speeding. If I had slowed down on that corner none of us would be here today. It was a silly mistake, but something that changed all the lives of the people I know forever.  I look and my mum and my sister standing on the stage together, devastated by my actions and wish I could that fateful day back. I wish I could tell my Mum what a wonderful mother she has been to me, I wish I could tell my Sister how much I love her, I wish I could have one more coffee with my Best Friend, I wish I could thank my Grandparents for their inspirations.  I wish......


I just wish I could have one more day.